She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.  

"Cash, check or charge?" I asked after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse. "So, do you always carry your TV remote?"

I asked. "No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the most legal, evil thing I could do to him."

UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)-------------------------- I know I'm not going to understand women. How can you take boiling wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider?

MARRIAGE SEMINAR-----------------------------------------------------------------

While attending a marriage seminar dealing with communication, Tom and his wife, Grace, listened to the instructor. "It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other."

He addressed the man, "Can you describe your wife's favorite flower?" Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's Pillsbury, isn't it?" The rest of the story gets rather ugly so I'll stop right here.

AND GOD CREATED WOMAN------------------------------------------------------ A man said to his wife one day, I don't know how you can be so beautiful all at the same time." The wife responded "Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me. God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you."