Subject: GUN FIGHTER
A young man in the Old West wanted to be the best gunfighter
alive.
He practiced every day but knew that he was still missing something
that would make him the best. One night, as he was sitting in a
saloon he
spotted an old man who had the reputation of being the greatest gunfighter
in
his day. So the young fella went over to the old man and told him his
dream.
The old man looked him up and down and said, "I have a suggestion that
is sure
to help."
"Tell me, tell me," said the young man.
"Tie the bottom of your holster lower onto your
leg."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?"
"Definitely," said the old man.
The young gunman did what he was told, then in a flash he
drew his
gun and shot the bow tie off the piano player. "Wow, that
really helped.
Do you have any more suggestions?"
"Yeah, if you cut a notch in the top of your holster
where the
hammer hits, the gun will come out smoother."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?"
It sure will," said the old man.
The young guy did what he was told, drew his gun in a blur
and shot
a cufflink off the piano player.
"This is really helping me. Is there anything
else you can share with me?"
"One more thing," said the old man. "Get that
can of axle grease
over there in the corner and rub it all over your gun."
The young man didn't hesitate and started putting the grease
just on
the barrel of the gun.
"No, the whole gun, handle and everything," said
the old man."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?"
"No," said the old man, "but when Wyatt Earp
gets done playing
that piano, he's going to shove that gun up your ass, and it
won't
hurt as much."