... your stall warning plays "Dixie".

... your cross-country flight plan uses flea markets as check points.

... you think sectionals charts should show trailer parks.

... you've ever used moonshine as avgas.

... you have mud flaps on your wheel pants.

... you think GPS stands for going perfectly straight.

... your toothpick keeps poking your mike.

... you constantly confuse Beech craft with Beechnut.

... just before impact, you are heard saying, "Hey y'all, watch this!"

... you have a black airplane with a big #3 on the side.

... you've ever just taxied around the airport drinking beer.

... you use a Purina feed bag for a windsock.

... you fuel your wiz bang 140 from a Mason jar.

... you wouldn't be caught dead flying' a Grumman "Yankee".

... you refer to flying in formation as "We got ourselves a convoy!"

... there is a sign on the side of your aircraft advertising your septic tank service.

... when you are the owner of Red Neck Airlines and pilot of Redneck One.

... you subscribe to The Southern Aviator because of the soft paper!

... you have ever incorporated sheetrock into the repair of your aircraft.

... you have ever responded to ATC with the phrase "That's a big 10-4!"

... you typically answer female controllers with titles like "sugar" or "little darling'."

... she responds with the words "Honey" or "Big guy" then she may be a redneck.

... you have ever used a relief tube as a spittoon.

... you glance down at your belt buckle to help you remember your N-number.

... you have ever tried to impress your girlfriend by buzzing her doublewide.

... the preprinted portion of your weight and balance sheet contains "Case of Bud".

... your go/no-go checklist includes the words "Skoal" or "Redman".

…your VHF antenna has a fox or coon tail tied to it.

…you have the shell of a plane fuselage in your yard, on blocks.

…you have a Hurst shift handle on your throttle lever.

…there's a beer can with the top cut out stuck between the seats as a 'bakky can.

…there are blank holes in your instrument panel, and you can't remember what went there.

…the sick sacks in your seat pockets have "Wal-Mart" on them.

…your "seat covers" are layers of duct tape.

…instead of carpet, your plane is lined with tar paper.

…all the cardinal direction letters on your mag compass have been replaced with "S".