The potatoes cook underground, and all you have to do to have lunch is to pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.

Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs.

"IT'S SO DRY IN TEXAS THAT..."

The catfish have ticks and have forgotten how to swim

An Odessa man fainted and they threw sand in his face to bring him to.

The cows are giving evaporated milk.

The trees are whistling for the dogs.

A sad Texan once prayed, "I wish it would rain - not so much for me, cuz I've seen it -- but for my 7-year-old."

"YOU KNOW YOU'RE IN TEXAS WHEN..."

You can say 110 degrees without fainting.

You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off.

You can make instant sun tea.

You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.

The temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly.

You discover that in July, it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car.

You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.

Hot water now comes out of both taps.

It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is out on the streets.

You actually burn your hand opening the car door.

No one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car or not having air conditioning.

Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"

If you have heard un-nerving chirping or experienced flying things bouncing off your body when you approach your building, it is CRICKET SEASON.

Crickets get their name from the high-pitched sound or "chirp" produced when the male rubs his front wings together to attract a female.

There are many sizes and different kinds of crickets but for the purpose of this article we will just call them all crickets. In most all species their life cycle and habits are the same. The species that is the biggest problem to our buildings and homes is the "House Cricket". Normally they live outdoors especially in garbage dumps, preferring warm weather, but will move indoors when it gets colder, usually in late summer. Crickets are usually an October, November pest but they are appearing earlier each year. These crickets can live indoors completing their life cycle with eggs laid in cracks, crevices and other dark areas such as behind baseboards.

Adults are very attracted to lights, become active at night (hiding during the day), crawl, jump or fly, sometimes in countless numbers up the sides of building, entering openings of even second and third story windows and roof skylights. Have you guessed yet who that reminds you of.? They feed on silk, woolens, nylon, rayon and wood. They can bite when handled carelessly. They are found in fields, pastures, lawns, roadside and in woods.

Control Measures: Eliminate outside lighting, if possible.

Prevention: Sanitation is the most important means of eliminating nuisance crickets. Keep all areas in and around buildings free of moisture, dense vegetation and weeds, (1 foot band next to foundation). Mow lawns, cut weeds, and clean up garbage collection areas. Caulk and seal all cracks and crevices, especially near the ground level at basement windows and doorways. Convert to sodium vapor yellow lights (less attractive to insects) instead of white, neon mercury vapor lights.

Trash and dumpsters should be placed as far from the building as possible. It is very important to keep dead crickets removed, they have a high protein content in their body which means they smell very bad if left to decay.